Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Southampton Solent University - Warshash Maritime Centre
That's the university which the Shell Company offers. It's a three-year course, which is way more than enough for me. There's two paths which I could take, it is either cadet/deck or cadet/engineer. And the one I prefer is the one with engineer-ish-ness-ism. According to my brother, because it is a degree ( Bachelor of Engineering ), I won't be forever bonded to the Shell Company. Once I graduated after the three-year course, and the three-year service, which is six years altogether, I could pull myself off of Shell bondage, and go anywhere I'm willing with my engineer certificate, shoving it off to any departments in Brunei by any engineering means.
I repeat once again in this post, University of Brunei Darussalam is still not an option. That's the conversation I had with Zuhri. He's hunger for a scholarship too. And so, this scholarship is very important to me. I only need to get 120 points to be eligible to apply, which is basically DDD at least, the higher the better.
But the problem is, there's Maths. Both of these paths require Maths in major, which I don't have any in luxury. I got a D7 in my O levels, and absolutely not taking it for my A levels. I'll just hope my A levels results to be good. Personally, I hate Maths. I never succeed in Maths. I have no gift in Maths. Life in MD I thought was a way of getting rid of Mathematics, once and for all in my life. I just can't imagine that I'll have to study that nightmare once again, in order to achieve LIFE. I gave up numbers long ago. Why do think none of my subjects in MD related to numbers at all?
The maximum applicants is 14 people. And that's it. I'll just pray that I'll get accepted, and not many people will apply, so competitions won't be difficult. But to study Maths again? Gowwhhh.
Monday, February 4, 2008
Ah. Blogging... again . Hmm. I am not constantly doing it, due to some respective explanations.
It's been way too long since I can remember the last time I blogged. And when I tell you that I can't remember, that means it. I'm too well known for my long term memory in my previous school, among my classmates, referably. The slightest lift of your brows upon me when I misslook at you can put a print in my belirium slash neurotic nerves for the rest of my life, or life after. Or even a promise you made, which you forgot that you did, or when I asked you about a person and you said you didn't know him/her, and when I reviewed about it back 6 months later, and you thought you did not say you did not know him/her, you're wrong. I don't make mistakes like that. My memory is good, in non-educational stuff pulang. And now, let me stop trash-talking.
Phew. What did we miss? or perhaps I miss?
Ah yea, my AS results. Oh man. It was two subjects that I had taken. They didn't come back well, I suppose. Although I'm this close to dropping Mrs. Nourse's class. And referring back to my desire of attacking scholarship, I'm not doing too well. Very frustrating, inevitably. And between the talk with my brother way earlier than this day, I'd say my mindset has largely been directed to someplace else.
There's this BST right, very well known for the abbreviation that I don't even need to mention. It struck my thoughts pretty hard that in current moment, I'm having more than fifty percent sure of applying it, after my A-levels, of course. It is a cadet/deck, cadet/navigation or whatever more it is of this job. It is remarkably a highly-good-pay job, starting off with 4.2 k total salary plus allowance, and three-year scholarship course. It is a 4-month offshore and one day onshore for every two weeks, and 2-month off days. If we think pshycologically, it seems a burden and lifeless, but but, mathematically, it's no different than having a normal desk job with fridays and sundays off, and in fact, this job offers more working day off than ordinary civil occupation.
It is not about the privileges that BST has that caught me interest, it is about the privileges that I have now, making me eligible to acquire this job. Seeing i have no strong bonds of relationship to worry about, and i have a system of friendship who understand and supporting me of what I'm doing, and normal life, without anything that could give me reasons of not to choose this job. Life, is my destination. University of Brunei Darussalam is not an option. For me it's not. It's either govermental scholarship, or this. And If didn't get the govermental, then this it is. But it's not my job to completely decide where I will be in the next 11 months. Mindset, is an easy thing to be persuaded. But I surely will work as hell to make everything happen.
Slash. Slash. Slash. Slash. Slash.
Zazu's guitar is awesome!! Ah, seriously dude. Its strings are nylons, and the physical of the guitar and the freds are totally suitable for high-class performance, they sound extremely pleasing to my freaking ears. It is a shame to let it go to a waste. HAHA. Just kidding, man. Why, you're a good guitarist too. And talking about music and school, I'm thinking of going musical.... IN SCHOOL!
And you thought I was speaking metaphorically, But I weren't. Very much mid-last year, I had been planning of forming an international musical mini orchestra, which I put it in plain English, a club in school. Consisting of a few of every basic instruments in an actual orchestra, which are guitars, bass, piano, violin, trumpet ( if affordable ), flute, combined with traditional, simply and importantly, Gulintangan, gendang, and others. I wouldn't put in the drums, they're just too 'heavy'. Which I don't think would get the school's approval anyway. I'm meaning to a more lively, universal, orchestra-ish genre of music. And for the information, I'll just keep this club private, which means all the players that I will be having, will strictly be the persons whom I only know and close with. Except, if this club advances in school's approval, then we will be recruiting members, perhaps audition, and from the BEs. WUUU~ IF and if. But I'll just keep the club small, but steady. I already have the list of my potential players, some good violinists and pianist, and of course, good guitarists I know in MD. I talked to Azzah about this, as she's been experiencing major musical involvements in school, and some MPs for advice. They said it's not a bad idea. All I gotta do is try.
And if we go further north to the future, I surely will be hoping to co-operate with other musical organisations in school, the choir, for instance, or the hadrah. And we will also introduce chinese theme songs into our list. As I said, universal. And also, hopefully, we wish to appear more on school functions as the background music and rename the school's goodwill of its education, and music. And for the start, Sazzy recommended that we begin without the consent of the teachers, which means unofficially. And whatever might happen, and if it happens good, THEN we will consult the authorities. Hopefully, mate. But I will surely need the whole say of everyone, to push our luck. Aha.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!A combination of an absolute assassin.Small+fast+invisible+attack speed+invisible again+silencer+backstabs+and invisible.And that's my character.
AND NOW. HOW THE HELL COULD I BE KILLED?!And HOW THE HELL MY FRAG is 12-12?! ( means 12 kills and 12 deaths )Stressed and stressed and stressed and frustrated.Well, of course counter items exist. Like gems or wards, to detect me. But as a Stealth Assassin myself. I'd always know how to avoid those, right?
And it's really degrading when the fucking european gamers pick Gondar the Bounty Hunter or Stywygr the Bloodseeker to fight against me. Or the Naga Siren or the Spirit Breaker or the Destroyer. They are really my great anti-heroes in the game. They have skills which could detect or disable me. The Night Stalker is also hard to kill, cause he's fast during the night. Or even Anti-Mage, cause he teleports alot and that sucks.
And when any of these heroes got picked, it'd be hard for me now to buy stuff, just say Buriza for initial. And without it, I'm just a simple assassin. Invisibility is my greatest specialty. I don't have other AoE spells or magic attacks, I only go for kill when the enemies are dying. So without my invisibility, I'm pointless.
And more disheartening, my wireless connection seems to be flushing down these hours. Mannn. Today of all days. I have high delay and laggy, and me as an asian playing in european gates, I'd say it is quite embarrassing. And when it lags, I often got killed easily and that'll make me a noob. Which I am so not. I am a pro, of course. xd
But I'm being patient. Rikimaru the Stealth Assassin will kick your ass as soon as the Net got cured.Just, arghhhhh.HOW THE HELL COULD I BE KILLED?! Mannnnnn.
PS: This post is entirely dedicated to the World Cyber Gaming / Cyber Pro-Athlete League and Northrend.
And to those, who understand this. xD
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
Fuhh.
Me and scholarship. Hmm. What's wrong with this picture?Alriiiiiiiight. It's my aim, okay. I know. I know, no one would believe me that I'd make it. Honestly, I don't even believe in myself if I could make it. Fourteen years of school or so, I've never shown a potential of me being in the future, holding luggages and waving to my family at the airport, or having this Doa Selamat function at home, relatives coming over, farewell-ing me for my study overseas, no. Not that much.
Nine people from my family tree, those nine who I call cousins had tasted the glory to be sent off to either YouKay, or Aussie on scholarship courses. One flew off 6 years ago, and this year will be his last, coming home as a doctor. One just took off last year, my age. One already came back as an accountant. And so are the stories of the rest.
And this scholarship thing? Where did it come from? It usually happens when you have a relative gathering, consisting of the involved uncles and aunts whose son or daughter had been sent off. Especially when most of them ARE lucturers, or principals, or teachers or whatever ties they've gotta do with education, this topic will always comes first. And as fate would have it, I always happen to be sitting in the middle of this conversation, and have to listen to all of it. I could have moved someplace else, but it'd be rude now, wouldn't it?
The elderly, of course they want us to listen to whatever they've gotta say, and they know too that we wouldn't like it. We just have to, sadly. And while this scholarhip conversation thing is going on, and my uncles and aunts are telling how their children are doing overseas, my father would take a glance or two at me once in a while, and sigh, not long after. As if he was saying to me like, "Kau bila lagi?" or something like that. I know he's jealous. And disappointed, to some extent. Relax father, the time will come. Just you wait.
Of course I don't want to see my father's face to be forever looking like that. And of course I'd love to see one day him smiling, and proud of me at the same time. And surely, I don't want to be left behind in the family tree of those who made it overseas.
And here's me. Sitting infront of the desktop, blogging at 4-ish am in less than 2 hours of school re-opening. Wasn't I suppose to be having a good sleep and have a fresh start tomorrow? Just by the way of being an excellent student, who is lusting for scholarship? But then it's okay. It's only been the first day, and I promise tomorrow will be fine. I haven't recovered yet from the holiday's jet lag.
And also tomorrow, is the starting of new style of studying; twice the efficiency, twice the effectiveness, and twice the hardwork. I'll be writing notes, short ones obviously for brainstorming. I'll review last year's syllabus, and again, jotting down whatever's important. I'll even stick the papers to the wall if I have to, just like when Michael Scoffield studied Fox River. I'll reduce night outings and weekends. I'll have to control diet now, eat proper food to help my brain's functionality, so that I'll revise smoother. And the most important of all, improve my obedience strength to Allah. Now that I've worked so hard, all of it wouldn't buy off if it wasn't for His blessings. So I need to take care life from every different perspectives.
Now that it's Maktab Duli Season 2 and it's Season Finale, I'm not gonna lose. I'm gonna prove that I'm somebody, and I'm gonna shove it in their face! In a good way by the way. I'm gonna improve my interaction, my manifestation and my education. New Year's resolution baby!
Okay. Now that's lame.
Monday, December 31, 2007
Together we made it through.
It's less than 24 hours until new year's countdown. And considering the plans I've got to make come true for 2007's farewell and the opening of 2008 tomorrow, I haven't had enough sleep. Or maybe I just don't want to sleep, for now.
Earlier this year I made a list in my mind of my hopes and my dreams, and my goals and my expectations. Some were accomplished, some have not. But this far, I'm happy for what I've done. I'm proud of who I've become.
The arrival to Maktab Duli. The meeting of new friends. With the presence of new lives and faces, new surroundings and atmosphere, I'm totally not the same person as I used to be. There are times when I've become somebody that I'm not proud of, but I didn't regret them. Mistakes and corrections are just another key to greatness and wisdom.
This year, I had made my shots. So will I, the year next.
I'll just hope the past don't trouble me, as well as the future, for yet it has to come. Tonight is the celebration baby. YOU GUYS SHOULD HAVE A BLASTY BLAST!
Farewell 2007. Welcome 2008.Happy New Year 2008 and have fun on Your New Year's Eve!
Again, Happy New Year 2008 everyone!!
Outuntil midnight. xp.